To Put A Hole In My Head.

"Real statues just lay out in the sun.

But a man who poses as a stone gets lost."

You loved me for me.

I swear i won't forget that.

I swear i won't forget you.

I swore myself to secrecy.

But secrets are problematic.

And now, my truth is you.

I've been hurt.

Beat down.

I need to stand up for myself,

when dealt a shitty hand by my father,

or friend.

But i'm too proud to admit i'm totally lost without you,

and why i shout and cry in the mirror at myself.

Tragically,

i only think of you.

Like she thinks of me.

We made everyone jealous 'cause they'll never have what you and i had.

We were so mischievous.

Remember when i'd sing for you in the shade,

on those magical Summer days?

Back when we weren't fearful of fear.

Back before that shit went down.

And i knew from that day,

i would never be the same.

Inevitably, he created me; a monster.

A stubborn, selfish, brick wall.

A person now living in fear of judgement through vanity.

But then again,

who's really content with their life anyway?

Well i guess it ain't that bad,

going blind and being so close to death.

So inevitably it condemns me to be,

to say the least,

a melodramatic, bipolar epiphany of sound.

Everyone's inevitably doomed.

The only thing that you know,

is that you don't know a thing.

Some people don't even realise that.

Are they ignorant?

Just plain stupid?

Or uninformed?

A word of advice,

for the men and the mice;

this road is empty.

Remember that.

But i'll continue to live my life.

If you can even call this a life.

I should be bed ridden,

or dead next to the bed.

I've had enough getting up,

grounded to the illness i've had since i was young.

Illness?

Plural.

So i've come to the conclusion,

that i'm not only helpless

but i cause more trouble then need be.

I'm pretty much head over heals,

upside down,

spun around for you.

I never said forever, ever.

Meaning,

this would have ended sooner or later.

You're just choosing sooner.

Did it really mean shit when you said you loved me?

"I've got a pit in you stomach

and my hands are shaking.

Unsteady and waiting.

I've got a lump in my throat

and a whole in my chest"

and i'm fighting the urge,

to put a hole in my head.

By Monsters, That Is.

I haven't been myself lately.

But no-one is to blame.

My head and my thoughts,

have just been invaded.

By monsters, that is.

We'll Be Reunited.

These boys.

This town.

This beach.

This mountain.

This is where i need to be,

to be happy.

We'll be reunited.

Me. According To The Internet.

Advanced Global Personality Test Results Extraversion || 10% Stability || 10% Orderliness |||||||||||||||||||| 90% Accommodation |||||||||| 36% Intellectual |||||||||||||||||||| 90% Interdependence || 10% Mystical |||||| 30% Materialism |||||||||||| 50% Narcissism |||||||||| 40% Adventurousness || 10% Work ethic |||||| 30% Conflictseeking |||||||||||||| 60% Need to dominate |||||| 30% Romantic |||||||||| 40% Avoidant |||||||||||||||||| 80% Anti-authority |||||||||||||||| 70% Wealth |||||||||||||| 60% Dependency |||||||||||||| 60% Change averse |||||||||||||||||||| 90% Cautiousness |||||||||||||||||| 80% Individuality || 10% Sexuality |||||||||||||||||||| 90% Peter pancomplex |||||||||||||||||| 80% Histrionic |||||||||||||||| 70% Vanity || 10% Artistic |||||||||||||||||||| 90% Hedonism |||||||||||||||||| 80% Physicalfitness |||||||||||||||| 70% Religious || 10% Paranoia |||||||||||||||| 70% Hypersensitivity || 10% Indie || 10%

Take Free Advanced Global Personality Test
personality test by similarminds.com

Is My Doing.

I have a consistent inner monologue going on in my brain.

I don't really listen to what other people have to say.

I only take what i want from the words they say to me.

Is this a "bad" thing?

Ultimately though,

every decision i make,

"good" or "bad"

is my doing.

The Thought Of Being Anywhere Near You.

I've been thinking about forgiving you,

but i don't know why.

Maybe,

it's because i've heard that you've changed.

Or maybe,

it's just because i miss you so goddamn much.

I hate you for what you did.

But that doesn't mean i forgot all the good days.

So i've been thinking about forgiving you.

Again.

But deep down,

part of me remembers the pain.

Part of me is destroying itself at,

the thought of being anywhere near you

Will Find You And Make It Ohkay.

Sometimes,

it seems like you are the only one in the world who is struggling,

who is frustrated,

or unsatisfied,

or barely getting by.

But that feeling is a lie.

And if you just hold on,

just find the courage to face it all,

then some,

or something

will find you and make it ohkay.

Regardless.

You say i'm not alone.

But i feel alone.

I trust that you feel like you're there for me.

But to what extent?

I am not your number one.

I am only one.

It's a passive thing to trust you.

It's a passive thing to crave you.

It's a passive thing to love you.

I wonder,

if it's passive for you.

Or do you have to try?

I don't think you should have to try to do any of those things..

regardless.

Good Times

LOL @ these days xD

Thug Life, Hug Life.

Album Cover Ideas? O.o

Thankyou.

I don't know what the future holds,

but i know it's not me down.

Here to create.

Inspired by talented and amazing people.

Thankyou.

I Think Today Will Be Great!

My new controller came in the mail today!

And i'm pretty fucking excited for make new music!

My set up is complete.

I think today will be great!

Someone Who Forgave You.

Who'd ever guess that you'd sell yourself short,

to get the weight off your chest?

And i thought that this meant that when you said that you were sorry,

that you'd changed for the better.

But now i see the truth behind;

kind eyes,

white lies,

and all the things you set aside.

And all i ever wanted was a figure in my life to help me get by.

Raised up in the sticks.

Clicks,

shells and kicks.

Breaking my ribs.

Tired of being sick.

Giving mum a kiss.

Just to give her son a wish,

not to leave me like this.

Cause Daddy's still on the piss.

And yeah, i know you had a plan,

cause you were staying with your man.

Even though some fucking dude was trying to blast you with a can.

Well i didn't think he could and i don't think that he can.

Cause the only leverage that he had,

ended with the Klan.

But i got stuck sick.

Love sick.

Waiting on the day i can leave this shit.

And when i put this shit together.

Yeah, i see all the times you turned your back.

Not a friend.

Not a father.

Not a brother.

Letting it rest on a heart so black.

Give it a chance, old man.

Oh man..

Yeah, you never had the spine to give me something worth while.

Am i asking to much, old man?

Yo, fuck it!

Why am i trying to waste my time?

Like i ever thought i'd get through to you with a beat or a rhyme.

You never been there, man.

If you had,

i wouldn't be relying on a figment of my imagination.

Oh, so lonely.

Slowly dying.

So take the money you never spent.

And buy yourself a fucking clue.

Cause all along you've had support.

Someone to love you.

Someone who looked up to you.

Someone who despised you.

Someone that you lied to.

Someone who forgave you.

Favourite Song At The Moment.

I'm Dirty, Like Peanuts' Pigpen. I''l Give A Bitch Dysentery.

By JakeWolf

Lust > Depression.

Constant state of euphoric lust and the thought of tagging down all day

VS

Antagonizing depression and sadness.

Lust > Despression