People You Know.

How many more of you people

think you know a fucking thing about me

and what i write about?

If you do,

tell me,

cause i don't even know.

Idiot.

You're still in school.

You're walking around with a chip on your shoulder.

What chip could you possibly have?

Go home, idiot.

An Honest Love.

I remember thinking i was going to marry you.

We had it all planned.

We named our children that didn't even exist.

You decided to take me around the world,

even though i didn't like travel.

We were completely and undeniably head over heels in cliche love.

I remember the way girls looked at me,

with my hand in yours.

I remember feeling absolute infinity between us.

I remember wanting to call you mine "forever".

At the end of the day,

you were perfect,

in every way, shape and form.

I couldn't think of a single flaw,

even if my life depended on it.

I guess this just goes to show that there are perfect people.

Wasting Away.

How

does

it

feel

to

know

that

you're

wasting

your

life

away?

Crucify Me.

Go ahead and crucify me for not being afraid to speak my mind.

I'd rather have that then live life in fear

and being brainwashed by society.

Time And Confusion.

My brain is too cluttered to sleep.

My body is too tired to do anything.

I'm in a complete state of boring confusion.

I'll Be Fine.

Selfish minds.

By the way,

i'm fine.

Thanks for asking.

To Legit To Quit.

Why am i so stupid as to believe

that people are legit and different from everyone else?

Every single new person i've hung out with lately

is useless and dead to me.

You're all fucking slaves

and i tried to help you open your eyes.

Everyone nowadays is so fake and self centered.

Enjoy your pathetic existences.

Bro My God.

Liquid Lives.

It's funny how much people like to twist words around.

The world today is over connected.

It's like people don't know how to cope,

if they don't know about every second

of everyone else's lives.

Curiosity wasn't alone.

Ignorance also killed the cat.

Don't Let This Win Over You.

Life is a series of calluses.

This is just another layer.

So build them up,

tough it out,

that's your skin.

Don't let anyone under there.

Everyone Looks So Good From Here.

I decide who gets the privilege

of being different from everyone else

in my eyes.

Liquor And Love Lost.

I was flying high.

I had a grin on my face.

I was numb down to my toes.

Lights were flashing.

Music was blasting.

I sat with a group of your friends,

rolling a ridiculous amount of smokes.

My heart was completely full to the brim with happiness.

I thought i'd be awkward all night.

I thought i wouldn't have anyone to talk to.

I thought the majority of your friends hated me.

But there i was,

laughing with them.

I felt on top of the fucking world.

It took six words and one sentence to shatter that feeling completely.

It turned my entire night around.

"You need to find your girlfriend."

The stern look in his eyes told me he wasn't playing around.

I left the company of your friends.

I walked around the house until i finally found you.

But it wasn't just you.

It was him too.

And i notice your hand on his leg.

I told you to get up.

You looked up at me.

Your eyes were empty.

I don't think you could see the pain that was my own.

I walked back out to your friends before you could say anything.

You didn't follow.

I spent the next hour sitting at the end of the driveway.

When i'd finally managed to suppress my anger,

i stumbled back tot he party.

Once again, someone told me to check on you.

My fists were clenched.

This time i stormed through the house.

When i opened the door,

when i turned on those lights,

i didn't even notice it was you.

I mean, do you think i'd expect that?

To see you laying there,

with your legs entangled with his?

"Get the fuck outside, now."

But you didn't move your legs.

This time the anger couldn't be contained.

I needed to let it out.

I grabbed him by the scruff of his shirt

and rammed his body up against the wall.

Punches were thrown,

and words were yelled.

I left the room.

I figured you looked happier staying with him.

It had been an hour since i'd seen you last.

I thought maybe you were sleeping.

I walked into the room again.

And there you were.

Still with him.

I yelled at you.

I wasn't kidding around this time.

And you fucking knew it.

You crawled off the bed, took my hand, and led me outside.

You left me with a bunch of people i had never met before.

You knew how awkward i am around strangers.

For him?

I can't forgive you for that.

We yelled at each other.

We cried together.

We punched the same wall.

You know my heart.

You know my scars.

I fucking love you.

But you've lost me.

It's Complicated.

I was nervous when i made plans with you today.

I mean, i know you like me

and that complicates this thing called friendship.

Surprisingly, it was easier then i thought.

You kept your distance as we walked,

you sat a safe space away when we sat down,

nothing awkward was said

and we laughed about stupid things.

Remarkably, this afternoon was easy.

Remarkably, i loved every minute of it.

Tell Me Something Good.

This would be a lot easier

if you'd just tell me if you hated me or not,

or what it is i've done wrong,

if anything.

Rather then me having to guess daily

on why you don't talk to me.

It's so frustrating.

It's making me feel like i'm doing something wrong

just by talking to you.

Which is all i ever want to do.

You know i could be good for you.

But you wont have it.

Any of it.

I listened to everything you had to say

when you were in my shoes

and now it''s the other way around

and you're not here for me.

You're probably mind fucking me on purpose.

Pretty, Handsome, Awkward.

"You look really nice,

like pretty and just,

nice, i guess.

Not like food nice though.

Because friends are like potatoes,

if you eat them, they die.

And i don't think i want you to die,

not right now anyway."

Ever The Same, And Always Will Be.

I was so consumed by looking out for you

and worrying about people changing you,

that i didn't notice the obvious.

You were changing me.

And she knew it.

That's why she hates us being friends.

We always argue.

We always fall out.

And i'm always upset or angry about the situation.

So i'm doing what i should have done at the start.

I'm taking myself out of your life.

I'm not going to let you get me down anymore.

I've taken enough hits

and i've shed enough tears.

You may have made me insanely happy at some stages.

But the majority of the time,

you just made me miserable.

If you want to call saving myself "selfish",

go ahead.

I don't have the strength to care about your words anymore.

Moments Forever Faded.

Back when i used to stay at your house.

Back when we made forts and pancakes.

Back when we would tangle ourselves up in each other.

Back when you'd tap on my bedroom window to rescue me

and i'd jump out my window at half past one in the morning

just to talk in safety.

Back when McDonalds accused us of putting Jif all over their bathroom walls.

Back when you were here.

All of these are moments when i've felt satisfied with my life.

All these moments contain you.

Ten And Two.

Ten years ago,

we sat in your grandmothers lounge

and watched your favourite tv shows.

It should be you this year.

It should be you dressing up wit me

and it should be you keeping a watchful eye on me.

But instead,

it's her that's going to take my hand next week.

And although i adore every hair on her head,

i miss you so fucking much.

Life Like This.

730 days ago,

my life was completely different in every aspect.

Two years later,

i would have never guessed i'd have the life i have now.

You Can't Be Missed If You Never Go Away.

Right now,

i miss you more then ever.

I think we've both realised what we've done wrong.

I guess,

we'll just have to see how it plays out when i get back.

And I Dreamt Of You.

Last night,

i dreamt about the tubes in your throat

and your ice cold skin.

I dreamt about the black bruises covering your body,

the hole in your skull

and your eyes closed.

Drink The Night Away.

I don't know if this night has motivated me

or depressed me more yet.

But i think i should drink

and find out.

Sweet Talk 101

There are times you can't take me seriously at all.

And there are times when i'm dead serious.

It just depends how you talk to me.

Uneasy Hearts Weigh The Most.

I know you and him are just friends.

I know you love me.

But it's when you let him get away with things i never could.

It's when you laugh more

and smile more with me,

then when you're alone with me.

It's when you say he's one of your closest friends.

That makes me feel uneasy about the whole situation.

I'm sure i can trust you.

But at the same time,

i know i've made that mistake before.

Cut Of The Movie.

"You know, if i were you, i'd have sex with me."

You're perfect in my eyes.

Perfect.

Like, out of the movies perfect.

Everything you do or say sends shivers up my spine.

Where have you been all my life?

Miss Amazing.

"I'm not gonna lie,

Jeffree Star looks a lot sexier as a lesbian.

The scruff and lack of makeup?

That got me harder then a priest in a playground."

You know when a sentence like that is said,

your night is a good one.

For the first time in weeks,

i actually had an amazing, drama free night.

I know it should have been with her,

but it was with you instead.

I finally got to wake up with you,

even if we both had metal in our faces we don't remember.

Disappearing Hearts.

Modern day society has me convinced

that they haven't been making people with hearts lately.

Human After All.

I am human.

I breathe and bleed just like you do.

Treat me like one

and we'll be off to a good start.

Hacked!

Dear James.

i know your sick and cant be fucked getting on the computer so i hacked your blog to leave you this! and also its not hard to hack anything of yours when you use the same password for everything lol but i really think you should let me come show you the photos i took the other day. youre so cute in them james! seriously =P im listening to miss may i right now and thinking you. make sure you text me when you see this! =P

Love Ciara.

xoxo

Ps. are you proud i used capitals for our names? =P

Stop Talking, Start Dancing.

I talk to myself.

For Our Friends.

I don't know you very well.

And you're extremely close with him.

It feels like i'm treading in dangerous water.

But you're nice.

You don't care that i look like a mess more often then not.

And i'm really liking this friendship.

Best Ex Friend.

Y'know what,

it would possibly be a little better

if you at least tried to understand

and accept the way you've hurt me.

Y'know if you didn't keep trying to justify it

and actually took the consequences like the person you claim to be.

But the fact that you wont,

the fact that you are trying to make it seem like what you did was ohkay,

that was the deciding factor.

That's what ended our friendship.

Failure By Designer Jeans.

A friend and i have been having a debate about

whether wearing skinny jeans

as well as jandals (flip flops)

is considered "normal" or a "fashion disaster".

So i decided to take it to the unbiased opinions

of the Omegle society.

With the simple starting statement of

"Flip flops and skinny jeans, yay or nay?"

and sitting through multiple disconnects and horny strangers,

these are the replies.

Might i also add,

that i didn't say anything to sway their opinions.

I merely asked them to explain why.

"Yay. If you're actually skinny."

"Nay. It's very weird."

"Bitch. Please."

"Nay for a guy. Yay for a girl. Girls are built differently and their feet are usually smaller so they don't like, stick out. I hate when guys wear flip flops with jeans. God, i can't stand it. But that's just my opinion. I wouldn't date someone who wore that. Well, i would date them but i wouldn't like them wearing that. I'm gonna make sure my boyfriend looks good."

"Nay. That looks nasty."

"Yay."

"Fucker."

"Yay!!!! Cause they are in style and they give a laid back look."

"Nay. It depends. If it's a nice pair of legs, i'd say it's ohkay. But most people can't pull it off. Men in general should never wear skinny jeans. Women have the perfect size to make it work. I've never been a fan of fashion trends. So i'm a little biased."

"Skinny jeans are gay. Scenefag lololol,"

"Yay. Well, i'm female and i like wearing it cos it makes my ass look awesome and guys stare but males only wear skinny jeans if your cock is at least six inches."

- I told her i disagreed with her second statement.

"Yay on women."

"Yay, sillyface. YAAAAY. Because it's comfy. Duh. Need i say more? No."

"Guy, no. Girl, maybe. Skinny jeans on a guy is fine as long as he isn't fat. But i think only girls should wear flip flops."

"Yay! It's a look that can go many different ways. The shirt you wear and type of flip flops you wear can make the style bohemian, fashionable and comfortable."

"Nay."

"Yay."

"Yay. Show ma ass. That's why. And ma new nail polish too -- "

She started rambling on and on about men and how they talk about how sexy she is with her nail polish. I think she was trying to seduce me. I disconnected.

"Yay all the way! Cause it's like, the best."

"Hmm.. Nay. It looks kind of strange. Skinny jeans and converse, now that's a yay."

"Yay defoo. Cos i love flip flops and Lil Wayne."

"Yay. Cos a girl looks good in them."

"Yay. Cos it looks simple."

"Yay. Skinny jeans are hot on chicks and flip flops are comfy."

"I'm not a big fan of flip flops with jeans in general. Separately, they're fine."

"Ew."

"Yay."

"Depends on their size."

"Nay. Gay. Uncomfortable. Plus bad for sperm count. Serious mate, it's all scientific. Girls can torment themselves for fashion reasons all they want. Not clear to me. I myself don't like flip flops too. But that's my own bigotry."

High Timez.

We stayed up 'til crazy hours of the morning,

blasting the hardcore music she hates

and getting higher then the clouds,

to paint childish cartoon characters onto your wall.

There wasn't any reason for it,

it was a spare of the moment thing.

But that's what life is.

It's small decisions in life.

Even though i don't remember much about our "intense talk"

I can't thank you enough for being there at that point.

"Just be you. You're a good cunt and i love you."

Dogs Can Grow Beards All Over.

Kinny.

I've never really liked animals.

But walking past the pet shop and see this little guy staring at us,

it's impossible to turn away.

I named him after Jeremy McKinnon,

lead singer of A Day To Remember.

If animals could talk,

he would have had me at hello.

(:

Power.

Goodbye, Goodnight, For Good.

"I just wanna say goodbye.

Disappear with no one knowing.

I don't wanna live this lie,

smiling to the world unknowing.

I don't want you to try,

you've done enough to keep me going.

I'll be fine.

I'll be fine.

I'll be fine for the very last time."

Prepare for death.

Death is prepared for you.

Alone In The Dark.

I've been hurt by too many people.

It's made me who i am today.

Shy.

Insecure.

Paranoid.

Today i was thinking,

imagine how much easier it would be for me,

and the majority of others,

if i was alone.

Perhaps that's what i'll do.

Maybe that's how it's suppose to be.

Loneliness is the one thing i know best.

It's a comfortable feeling.

I've been so used to it.

Sharing a bed with my demons.

I wake up from my nightmares.

I calm myself down.

I can be alone.

It's what i know best.

Maybe,

that's how it's suppose to be.

Better Days.

I wont let you find out,

as much as it kills me to hide this from you.

A few days go,

i would have thought twice about this situation.

But now,

i don't think you deserve the truth,

seeing as i obviously wasn't worth it in your eyes.

You Deserve Nothing And I Hope You Get Less.

She told you the way she felt for you

and all you could think to say is

"What are you up to?".

She pretty much worships you.

I don't see what she sees in you,

but whatever it is,

it's something big.

In some ways,

i'm glad you didn't respond the way a normal human would,

because she's way to good for you.

She deserves the best

and no matter what she might think,

it ain't a girl like you.

Angels Sleep With The Lights Off.

Right now,

i'm well past overtired.

My body has had less sleep then it seems to like.

I'm way past the point of wanting to sleep.

I keep biting everyones heads off.

And to top it off,

you wont get the fuck out of my head.

Hold On Tight, Time Travels Fast.

Every person is different

and every person is perfect fro someone.

They might not be perfect for their whole lives,

but at some point in your life,

you'll find someone perfect.

They might only be for a small amount of time

and you might have several perfect people in your life.

But at each point,

they will be different.

And one day,

you'll find someone that is perfect all the time.

You'll fond someone who is your favourite

throughout every stage of your on going life.

And them...

they are the ones you'll wanna hold on tight to.

Ever Then Same, And Always Will Be.

I know you think i'm a real pain in the ass.

I know you think i'm annoying

when i stop you to hug me when we're walking.

I know you absolutely loathe in when i tickle you.

I know you get annoyed

cos i always want to hold your hand

even when you need them.

Truth is,

i know that inside you really love it.

And i like seeing you smile.

If I Only Had The Heart.

When Dreams Become Nightmares.

It's funny how we can dream of dreams that are so far from reality.

Because in all truth,

some way or another,

our dreams are exactly what is going on inside our minds.

How Glorious, This Alteration.

Photography is not difficult.

It's hardly even art to me.

Glorification of the mundane.

Never Meant To Break Your Heart.

I never meant to hurt you

and i have told you that time and time again.

I know from first hand that sorry hardly means a thing.

But i'm trying.

I just can't do it if you refuse to see what's right in front of your face.

I'm happy with her

and i wouldn't change a thing.

But that doesn't mean i don't want you.

Because, fuck, i do.

Can't we be innocent?

Can't we get to know each other in a harmless way?

Let me be happy.

Let us be innocent.

Acoustic.

"Girl, you're busy and that's fine

but there's one thing i gotta get off my mind.

I wont take to much of your time.

I promise this wont last long.

I used to be your biggest fan.

You used to say i was your man.

Now if i can't have you, no one can.

I'll be the last boy you hang up on.

So when the blindfold starts to slip

and the rope starts to rip

and i start ti give

and girl, you know i'm sorry.

But tonight i'll wait until i know you're fast asleep

to poison you with memories of you and me.

I pray you die slowly so i can be the last thing you see.

She's losing consciousness.

I'm gaining confidence.

It's starting to make sense.

She's covered in finger prints

from her lips to her hips.

All i wanted was one more kiss."

Backyard Poison.

Lies are like the move Poison Sting commonly used in Pokemon.

The initial damage is minimal,

but there's a chance it can make you sick.

If I Leave.

Tell me you aren't going to leave me.

Tell me you would do anything for me.

Tell me you would miss me if i wasn't around.

Tell me you would follow me if i walked away.

Tell me you will hold me together when i'm falling apart.

Tell me you aren't going to leave me.